Are YOU In a Hurry to Fix Your Life? By Joan Sotkin
10/03

Linda T. has been struggling for years to create more than "just enough.". About six months ago, she began to understand that there were old family-of-origin issues interfering with her ability to create financial comfort. And, although most of her problems seemed related to her cash flow, Linda sensed there were other areas in her life that could also be more comfortable.

While surfing the Net, Linda discovered both Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) and Be Set Free Fast (BSFF) and immediately purchased materials that could teach her these techniques. She did them every day, tapping on or treating whatever came up. She became almost obsessed with treating everything. Linda was in a hurry to fix her problems.

I talk to a lot of people like Linda who have put a lot of their hopes for a quick "cure" into the various energy psychology techniques. If you have been reading the materials on Prosperity Place for any length of time, then you know that I think both EFT and BSFF are incredible tools for eliminating emotional discomfort. But there is so much more to healing and creating an abundant flow in life that just tapping on discomforts or saying a cue word to overcome anxieties.

In this article, I'm going to make a few suggestions for making your journey to a healthier life a bit easier.

First, there are three basic ideas that I like to pose:

1. There is nothing to fix.

No matter where you are at the moment, you are fine. More likely than not, you are doing the best you can given who you are at this moment. I doubt that you wake up every day and say, "I'm really going to screw up my life today." You are who you are and you are ok.

Since you can't change this moment, you might as well accept it. The fact that you are reading this on a computer means that you probably have a roof over your head and enough food to eat. You are, in fact, safe and ok.
No matter what else is going on, there is nothing wrong with who you are or the choices you are making. There is no right or wrong way to be and there are no right or wrong choices. You are and you make choices. No judgment needed.

2. The future is going to continue, and you can count on things changing.

Accepting who you are does not mean that the rest of your life is going to be exactly as it is today. Your life is going to change. The choices you make in the moment can affect the quality of your future. If you follow the directions below, you can count on it changing in a positive direction.

3. Worrying is a waste of time.

Accepting this idea and working to give up worry is one of the choices you can make in the moment.

Now for some suggestions that can help you let go of the feeling that you have to fix yourself as fast as possible.

1. Stay focused in the present.

My first teacher said to me, "Life is a series of nows. If you live in the past or the future, you are missing your life."

You are focused on the future if:

You are focused on your wants and desires.
You are worried about what will happen if _______.
You think a lot about what you don't have.
You think everything will be fine when ________.

You are focused on the past if:

You rehash a lot of conversations you have had.
You hold grudges.
You find it difficult to let go of anger and resentments.
You are unwilling to forgive.

If you find yourself slipping into the past or future, say to yourself, There is no past, there is no future, there is only the here and now. Tune into the sounds, sights and smells around you, listen for your heart beat, or watch your breath.

2. Treat yourself like someone you love.

If someone were standing next to you saying the things that you say to yourself, would you let that person hang around or would you send him/her away? If you are carrying your critical parent around with you, get rid of it.

Make a list of things you can do to treat yourself in a more loving, caring and tender way. Each day, do at least one thing to express your love for yourself. Even if you don't feel it yet, do it. You could get to like it.

3. If you feel frantic and in a hurry to improve your life, etc., stop and breathe.

Don't do anything more until you feel the frantic feeling is gone. This could take a day or two. It doesn't matter if you don't fix yourself today. There is nothing to fix. In the moment, you are ok. (I know this can be difficult.)

If you find it difficult to let go of the frantic feeling and think you absolutely must do something to fix yourself, dialog with yourself and see if you can discover what is really going on. What is it about not fixing yourself that scares you? What are you afraid will happen if you don't fix yourself? (Never use the word money in your answer because it is never about money, it is always about something else.)

If, after doing this dialog, you uncover some deeper issues, then you might want to use meditation or other relaxation techniques. However, I suggest you avoid doing this just to get rid of any anxiety you are feeling. Use the anxiety as a pathway into what is going on behind your discomfort.

4. Get to know yourself.

This will help you tune into the benevolent, powerful adult that lives deep within your being. See Prosperity Tips #30 and #36. http://sotkin.com/moreinfo.html

5. Stay tuned to your inner voice.

All of the knowledge you need to create a healthier, more comfortable life is within you. Learning to hear--and follow--your inner guidance will more you forward toward your goal. See Prosperity Tips #24.

Here are some additional articles on Prosperity Place that can help:

You Have Enough Time
Believe in Yourself
Turning Scarcity into Abundance
Love Yourself Exercises

Joan Sotkin is a prosperity and performance coach and creator of the popular Web site ProsperityPlace.com, where she teaches a holistic approach to financial health. Joan's books include Prosperity Is an Inside Job, Build Your Money Muscles and Starting Your Own Business. On ProsperityPlace.com, you will find free articles, e-books and a monthly newsletter. Visit http://www.ProsperityPlace.com. #

- Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, MSW, CCH, CRT